Life’s Hiccups

I’m quietly sitting here contemplating how life can truly change in an instant. One minute you can be sailing through the soft waters of life full of blessings and then the next minute, sitting down looking like a deer in headlights. Blind sighted by the turmoil of not only daily routine, BUT LIFE! I feel like a tree that was uprooted during a violent thunderstorm. No tornado, no valid reasoning, winds just hit, then suddenly…..BOOM! Heart shattering into a million different pieces and scattered places you won’t ever find where they fell. I am having a rough time holding on to the little piece of hope I have left. Everywhere I look I see hurt, brokenness, pain, sadness, loss and I haven’t even turned from the mirror yet. The strong, deeply rooted tree that once withstood the numerous natural forces of nature is now gone. The roots, along with a small piece of the base are left in the ground, but what is visible is down. It took down fences and even part of a house with it. The house is now exposed and no one can reside there. This is the best explanation of myself, my heart and my family. I fell, completely caught off guard at what life was throwing at me. Even though my heart is shattered, I still know God is in control. When I fell, my family fell too! We are exposed and the work to rebuild has to be done from the inside out with God!

It feels like a spiritual attack and the only way I can fight back is on my knees in prayer. Only thing I can stand on is God’s word! The words for prayer are sometimes just tears that fall down my cheek. I can’t put the words together, but He hears my cries.

The pieces of my heart cry out to Him!! Only He can put the million pieces back together even better than I can fathom.

Join me as my journey continues……………………………

Advertisements

He’s Risen

No longer in the grave….Jesus has risen….He’s Alive! Not even death could hold him. He did it all for us…Yes, you and me!! So that we might be free from sin and have eternal life with Him and His Father! This is the best expression of Love….For He gave His only begotten son…..Pause and really think about this! Lord, for this, I will always praise and worship you! You are worthy of our praise!!

Forgiveness is a must! Jesus forgave those who crucified him on the cross. This is powerful, because we hold grudges against friends, family, coworkers, and even people who we never met who we felt have wronged us. They offended or hurt us in some way. Forgiveness is for you, not them. It doesn’t give a pass to the wrong, yet it opens up your heart to continue to hear and receive all God has for you! Your heart is no longer hardened!! It frees you from putting people on a pedestal that only God belongs. We must be careful because things and people came become a form of idolatry which is a sin. So to keep our relationship growing in Christ, we must evaluate ourselves within with God, instead of outside in the world.

Be ready to receive all God has for you by opening your heart to all Jesus has done for you!! He gave His Life for you!!

God’s Love

During an argument with a spouse or significant other, many of us just want our points to be heard and validated. Mainly, we want to be right! What happens when you are not heard? Or right….for that matter? What do you do? Get quiet, sulk, and get in your feelings? Or maybe we let our feelings turn into a sword and go for the kill with words that can never be taken back. We can allow our actions to become a dangerous road if we are not careful. The pattern of hurting the other person first can destroy a relationship as well as yourself. We can also, hold grudges against someone we love and they are able to go on with their lives while we are stuck in the past situation. Why do we do these things that are so hurtful to others, but mostly ourselves? These are people we say we love, but do we really even understand what LOVE is?

For many, many years, I thought I knew what love is, but I didn’t. My first true love is God. He showed me Agape Love. God loved me when I didn’t love myself let alone I didn’t know how to love someone else. Best way to describe it is…..read John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” This is truly amazing. God gave us his son to die on a cross for our sins, our bad habits, our sexual deviancy, our complete unrighteousness, and our ill will towards other human beings to name a few. How do we continue to love someone after they hurt us? If we could conquer this as a human race, I think we could be in such a better place. Hurt people, hurt people is a very true statement. In all of our brokenness, God can bring about a healing that no one can explain. A true peace deep within that you will never want to let go. How can you get this? Turn your attention to Him. Start a real relationship with Him, the one who Loves you so much more than we could ever deserve. It is not based on our feelings, what we can do for Him or do for others. It is simply put, God Loves US!!

After the argument, what next? I recently had an argument with my husband which ended in silence. Neither of us were willing to listen to the other person’s view points. We wanted to win and ended up we both lost. We didn’t speak for almost a day. We work together, so there was no escaping each other. I will say this, once God softens your heart, you can’t try to be hard again. For almost 40 years, I had a hardened heart and now I still don’t know how to process the emotions that once couldn’t escape. With God’s help, I’m getting better each day. I used to be able to be angry for days on end and manipulate the situation to my favor. I can’t do that any longer. I sincerely learned something this time, My husband loves me like Christ loves the church. (Ephesians 5:25 – “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;”)

For this lesson….I’m forever grateful!!

Victory

Yet, He died for us, so we might have life….Let’s pause and realize how great a sacrifice that must be. Problem is, we can’t even begin to wrap our minds around such a thing. We weren’t made to get the full picture, we were made to trust Him fully and with Faith! Do you praise Him for who He is? Or what He does? Both are right, but one is greater and what he designed us for! Praise Him for who he is and thank Him for what He does according to His will for your life! He is our all in all, our everything, Love, sin intercession, Gift giver…Holy Spirit, Healer, breathes new life in us each day, and He is Omnipresent! What is He to you? What are you doing with your life each day? Grace and Mercy are new each day, yet we carry baggage around that He said in His word to cast our cares on Him. So why the baggage? Do we just listen to what Pastors, friends, grandparents say about God or do we know Him and His word for ourselves?? I urge you to dig deeper in your relationship with Him. Ask Him to guide you to the scriptures and read with and open heart to receive Him.

Father, I humbly approach your throne of Grace. Father, I worship you, praise you and give you all the glory and honor! I ask that you touch every heart that reads this to seek your face and be encouraged today. Whatever is hurting them, grant them peace, what is missing…fill them with you, and most of all allow them to feel your Love today! Heal our bodies and mind, so we can have clear wisdom to grow deeper with you! Whatever your will for our lives today…we submit to you and receive in full faith all that is for us!! Thank you….In Jesus name, Amen!!

Say it, Now SCREAM IT…I have the Victory!!

Betrayal of the body

My skin feels like it’s ready to come off. I’ve dealt with many different health and sexual issues, but this is different.  I thought giving up the desires of the flesh was hard, but this is WOW! Every muscle and joint hurts, don’t feel like myself and nothing soothes the pain. The confusion in my mind sets in like a wave coating the sand only retreating for a short time to return. A low grade fever is raging war and there is no blanket of warmth that surrounds me. The right side of my body fails me as I wake up in a pool of my own sweat nightly. No more being held by my loving husband. Bruises come and go in the oddest of places. Doctors that I’ve seen in the past have no clue and it makes me give up on going. I know they practice medicine, but practice giving me some answers. I’m not a pill popper, so don’t throw them my way without an explanation. I’m frustrated and don’t want to be a burden of my family, so I strap on a smile and push through my day. I pray and ask God for answers and He’s been silent. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to be learning. Patience? Endurance? Trust? Humbling ones self? Perseverance?  No one can even imagine the pain I feel daily. Well, maybe you can??  I don’t look like what I experience or do I?  I’m clueless on what I’m supposed to be learning from God at this moment and I’m starting to think it’s supposed to be this way until He’s ready to reveal it to me. I search the Internet for answers, but just maybe I’m supposed to search Him and His word?? Yes, thank you Holy Spirit for the divine direction. 

Join me as my journey continues………
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.   Romans 12:12 NIV

For my own name’s sake I delay my wrath; for the sake of my praise I hold it back from you, so as not to destroy you completely.  See, I have refined you, though not as silver; I have tested you in the furnace of affliction.    Isaiah 48:9‭-‬10 NIV

Buried Alive

As the shovel hits the dirt of the earth, more things become unsettled. Rocks, bugs and ugly things pop up unexpectedly. The shovel keeps moving the dirt. The ground can no longer feel the pain after the initial sting. A hole is now forming and it’s getting deeper with each swing of the shovel. My hands are getting dirty and sweat is dripping from my brow. I start to think the hole is deep enough for what I need to plant, but I hear a still small voice saying go deeper. My hands are cramping up from all the work that I’m not used to. I thought this would be quick, yet I’ve been out here for over 2 hours. Digging up dirt and making a big hole with something small to plant. Lord, Why??? No response. The hole is very deep now and the once hard dirt is now soft. Not sure if it’s from my sweat or tears. Suddenly, the winds start raging as I try to run for cover, but I fall into the hole. The winds continue and the dirt I moved is now blowing over me. I scream for help, but no one hears me. I’m feeling the heavy weight and pressure against me and I can no longer fight against it. Help me Lord…..don’t you hear my cries?? I’m buried alive with the weight of life against me. There’s no way out, but use what I have to get out. The shovel didn’t fall with me. My hands are getting raw from digging. I lay still to rest for what it seems like weeks or even months. A new sense of peace washes over me. I feel a hand rest on my shoulder saying it’s time to grow. Are you ready to leave the dead things behind and grow with the newness of all I have prepared for you? I kept hearing the question over and over. I had no more fight left in me, so I softly said, “yes”. There was a sudden trembling of the ground that began to shake violently. I felt like I was catapulted from the deepest depths of the earth. I was now standing on the dirt which once held me bound. Thank you Jesus for your Grace and Mercy. “I’m free” was all I could scream!!!  I searched in my pockets for the seeds I was supposed to be planting….only to realize I was the seed!! 

Join me as my journey continues…………….
For as the soil makes the sprout come up and a garden causes seeds to grow, so the Sovereign Lord will make righteousness and praise spring up before all nations.  Isa.61.11.NIV 

The cords of death entangled me, the anguish of the grave came over me; I was overcome by distress and sorrow. Then I called on the name of the Lord : “ Lord , save me!” For you, Lord , have delivered me from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling, that I may walk before the Lord  in the land of the living.  Psalm 116:3‭-‬4‭, ‬8‭-‬9 NIV

Game of Life

Today’s the day to shift your focus from your circumstances to God. A full surrender to God’s will for your life. Whatever He has told you to do….DO IT!! Baby steps, small steps, leaping in or even a full on Jump….Get back in the game! We may be sidelined for a moment, but that’s not our forever place. Our place is in the game of our life with God as the head coach. In any game you seek direction from the coach, same thing here. You don’t ask a different player tips that knows nothing about your position. We may get hit, knocked down, but we get back up! We may be bruised, broken, and even disgusted BUT GOD….for He has not left us and this is when His greatest work can be done. We can no longer do it ourselves and things that don’t belong in our lives, He is removing. The pruning process hurts, but its very necessary. Stop resisting and let go of things that are hindering you from your groWTH….Allow Him to complete His greatest masterpiece……YOU!

Join me as my journey continues……..